I was what most people would consider a typical child. I was in many various ways ordinary. I was an ambitious gal, an overachiever. My dreams were bigger than the deepest depths of space. I learned very quickly in my young life to dream big.
I was born in a small town in Southern Indiana. The population density is no more than five thousand people. If you’ve ever lived in a small town you know what it’s like. For those of you who haven’t: living in a small town is like living in a place where everyone around you is your family. Everyone knows you. Everyone knows your business and they know what you do and have done.
Although I was born in a small town in Indiana I was raised in Southern Kentucky until my second year of elementary school. I spent my whole life moving around. It’s hard for someone who moves around a lot to maintain a close friend base so of course I endured some bullying.
I remember my life growing up in Kentucky in spurts. My memory of the time is very blotchy. Even with my spotty account of events they are still important to tell. You cannot know my story without knowing the pieces of the puzzle.
I have some fond memories of this time in my life. I remember once that my younger siblings and I actually tried to dig our way to China through our front yard. Needless to say both of my parents were not happy about the gaping hole in the yard, but I remember the excitement of thinking that we might actually make it to China.
I remember days in the hot sun aimlessly digging in hopes that we would make it through the earth. We were diligent. We would go out there and dig every day. I’m not sure how we got the idea to do this, but as you know kids will be kids. Children don’t let go of their big dreams till they get older and the adults in their lives assure them that they are silly or outlandish.
There was this one time when we stacked all of the chairs we could find up to try to touch the sky. We were convinced that if we stacked them high enough we would be able to touch clouds. I remember the pain of falling, but I continued trying to touch the sky. These things seem silly now, but in retrospect those were great times in my life. I look back and smile at the thought of someday touching the sky (if I didn’t fall out of the chairs).
One time my brother was playing inside the family car. I was on the hood of the car. He must’ve been 4 years old. He knocked that car in neutral and it backed down the hill. I jumped off very quickly and ran to get my parents. He ended up crashing into our neighbor’s car, but was not hurt.
My other siblings were always more daring than me. They always defied and did things that I would wish I had the courage to do. Even though they were younger than me I looked up to them for this reason.
Through all the hardships we went through they showed strength I would not possess till much later in my life. Trust me our childhood was filled with many hardships. Some were known, others were pushed down inside of us.
It’s hard for a child to deal with so many adult themes so young. Maybe I was defective from the start. Maybe I was not built to deal with things the way they were equipped. Maybe God had other things in store for me. Maybe I wasn’t able to deal with these things for a reason.