Love Kills Faster Than You Think

545040_4021728944329_43483935_nLove is so hard sometimes. Some people have this fairy tale fantasy of what love is and as soon as things get real they want out. Maybe an escape down the rabbit hole perhaps.

Things have always been real for me. I’ve never followed society’s norms. I just had no idea how hard things in a relationship can actually get. People lie. They betray you in every damn way possible. It’s human nature really.

Monogamy is not natural. Biology gives men hormones to want to be with every woman they see. This is no secret, but us women we still insist on him being true to only us. When he cheats we want out automatically without discussing it. We don’t even want to hear why.

In most cases the cheating is not because he no longer loves or cares about us. He’s not bored with us. It actually has nothing to do with us. It is more about biology.

We always blame ourselves. It literally kills us to deal with the fact that we were cheated on. We ask ourselves what’s wrong with us. What we should be asking ourselves is why we demand him to only have sex with us. If he is attracted to another woman we die a little inside. Why?

I think it is because society tells us unless we have a relationship based on monogamy we are wrong. I’m not advocating polygamy or poly amorous relationships. I’m not advocating lying. What I am advocating is defining your own relationship. Do not let society define what you want or need.

Once you and your partner define what you want in your relationship it is not okay to break these sort of vows to each other. It is not okay to lie to your partner. I’m not advocating this. Again I’m advocating that you define your own relationship, your own path. No one gets off the hook in a relationship. If you truly love someone you will value them. You will value the relationship enough to do what they want.

In the end relationships are so much more complicated than the Hollywood stories, frills, and society norms we’ve seen and learned. It is hard. It isn’t meant to be easy. Humans are very complicated self aware creatures. Don’t even get me started on marriage complications. Let me tell you love does kill, but a life without love is a slow lonely death.

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