Day one has been very rocky. We started out not wanting to talk to each other. My husband was very spiteful at first. The first few hours were extremely rough. He just did whatever and we barely spoke unless absolutely necessary.
Then we went out to pick a movie. That was interesting, but we were able to do it without arguing which is good. This is the first day without arguing in a while. We picked out some snacks and he didn’t want to take much part in that either. He was still a bit angry about the whole thing.
It’s not his fault he feels the way he does. I mean how do you tell someone you want to try not being a couple without them being upset. I laid it out in full disclosure. I told him that I did not want to be in a relationship with him right now. I told him I just wanted to be friends, but I didn’t want to get divorced. This isn’t so simple to tell someone you’re married to.
Then came the even harder part: moving out. Now I know what you might be thinking, but you’re wrong. I just moved out of our bedroom. I moved into the guest room. I took all I needed to live in here for the next 30 days.
We’ve also began establishing rules. No being naked around each other. No changing or showering around each other. No sex. No kissing. No touch other than what friends would do. No talking like we are married. We agree to give each other time and space, but rekindle our friendship.
At the end of the day it was a hard transition, but I’m willing to do what it takes to help our marriage. Marriage is about sacrifice. I’m willing to sacrifice the above mentioned things to help us both to remember why we value each other so much. We need to look past sex, our obligations to each other, and anything else holding us back to realize what those things are that make us want to fight for the relationship.
Once I explained in detail to my husband what this was about he jumped on board. He thinks it is a good idea. For all the people who have been asking if we are OK. Our marriage is OK. We still love each other. This is something to help us continue to love each other and to help us decide the next steps in our relationship. I hope by the end of this each of us will in our own way try to fight to be more than just friends.
If you want to see what happens next you’ll have to continue reading…